Report by Julian

After 37°C the day before, it was pleasant to wake up to cooler weather on Sunday. However, the buzzing power lines all the way to the car park indicated high humidity and another energy sapping day. I’ll happily admit that I was thinking of shortcuts even before we started and was tempted to go with the doctors, who set off for a short trip up Welshpool Rd, even before Peter arrived. Once Peter turned up, the instructions were instructed, the f-ckenberg virgins were identified and we were off.

The group was very chatty down Manning Rd and Albany Highway. This probably had something to do with the howling westerly behind us and we comfortably sat on 36 km/h during this time. We were slowed in Gosnells by Lisa attending to flat tyre. This also gave Mike Bonner the chance to catch the group and even by his impeccable standards for being late, this morning was impressive. Somehow during the change Peter and I found ourselves doing a second stint on the front as we headed on to Brookton Highway and then the aptly named Hill St at the start of the f-ckenberg. Onto the hill proper the brothers Dan and Jules attacked and were followed by Joe, Ryan, Alistair, Oliver and Mike. Still not feeling too flash, I was content to sat back and enjoy the carnage as the front boys hit the 21% section and as some started going backwards I made up a few places and ended up with a point. Ryan won the day, from Mike, Oliver and Alistair. Raphael was the second to last up on his first time and all he could utter at the top was the first syllable of the climb. Still at least he made it and full marks for doing so. We had one casualty about 2/3’s up with one rider turning back. I didn’t catch his name but he rejoined us later on after finding an easier climb up the scarp.

Climb 1 – 1. Ryan, 2. Mike B, 3. Oliver, 4. Medium Alistair,, 5. Julian

We were no sooner off again when the second climb began. On the early section everyone took it a bit easy until a small group got away – containing Ryan, Mike, Joe and Rob (a rider we picked up in Gosnells). My climbing legs were returning so I made an attack on Oliver and Brother Julian in the second group and got onto the last wheel in the front group. The more we climbed the better I felt and heading towards the finish I made a move to the front. Inevitably, Ryan shot past near the line with Mike, Joe and Rob following me in.

Climb 2 – 1. Ryan, 2.Julian, 3. Mike B, 4. Joe, 5. Rob

The regroup here was reasonably short and we were soon heading up Churchman Brook Rd for the descent down Soldiers Rd. Unfortunately for Matthew, a call to nature after the climb and a breakdown in the buddy system meant that he got left behind when we started again. However, he was able to join up with Mike B, who had a flat on Soldiers Rd and the two of them made their way back to Kalamunda together, as Mike had given instruction to the group to keep going. Of course we were all disappointed that Mike was out of the next few climbs but managed to put that behind us as were headed towards Urch Rd. This particular climb seems to get lost in the fear of f-ckenberg whenever we do this ride. In my opinion it is a tough climb and today I asked Pete to keep an eye on the gradient of the hill. Coming out of the valley it hits 16% and further up is another section at 15% and sure enough the downhill heroes who got the head start were soon being reeled in. Chris had a good start to the hill but dropped off about half way up. Ryan and Rob were battling it out on the front and Oliver and I were locked together behind them. Towards the top I finally dropped Oliver but didn’t have the legs to get to the front. Jarrad put in a big effort to pick up the final point and was looking a lot better than two weeks ago at Pinjarra. The smile on his face as he realised he’d bagged a point was a highlight of the ride.

Climb 3 – 1. Ryan, 2.Rob, 3. Julian, 4. Oliver, 5. Jarrad

Rob bade us farewell at the top and headed down the back side of the Kahuna. Chris was having a bit of back wheel trouble but soon had that sorted out and we were off again towards Pickering Brook. I stayed at the back of the group during this stage and helped get Phil through his first Sunday ride for quite a while. We regrouped at the Pickering Brook turnoff on the left had side of the road and it was clear that everyone was thinking about the short cut to coffee. Peter said we’d head the Merchant and I asked if anyone wanted to do the full ride and head up to the Observatory. Heiko volunteered to go with me, then Dan and Jules sensed some cheap points and also volunteered, followed by Oliver and a couple of others and suddenly the whole group was with us. I felt very proud of everyone at this stage – staying together and finishing off what we started – very character building stuff!

There was a Master’s Race on in Pickering Brook and John and Joe made a sprint for the finish line. The marshal there held up a 9 laps to go sign but this was dutifully ignored as were turned into Patterson Rd. The group started to stretch out on the incline and as I passed Lisa I’m sure I heard words to the effect of doubting my parentage being muttered after I said she’d thank me later for making her come this way. Towards the top of the climb a group of 6 were still together. Joe went early and couldn’t hold on leaving Ryan to get away. Jarrad now had the taste of points and collected 3rd after I caught him on the last rise. Brother Jules and Oliver rounded out the placings.

Climb 4 – 1. Ryan, 2.Julian, 3. Jarrad, 4.Brother Jules, 5. Oliver

There were a few tired bodies at the end of this climb (but wasn’t everyone glad they did it?) and as Peter set instructions for coffee at the Merchant (for the second time!) we were all fairly keen on getting there. Going through Bickley Valley Brother Jules asked if he could sit behind me during the final climb. I was happy to help out but this caused some confusion with Ryan who thought we were ganging up on him during the climb. Joe and Peter set the early pace on the hill as I kept Brothers Jules and Dan on my back wheel. Coming up to the flat bit the others had dropped off leaving Ryan and the Julians in front. Ryan was unaware of my pacing and made a move just before the last climb. Honour-bound to Brother Jules I stayed back and pushed him through the last stretch and came through in about 8.35. Not sure if it was a PB for him, but certainly a respectable time after a 5 climbs in the conditions. Oliver and Peter followed and soon the group descended on the Merchant.

Climb 5 – 1. Ryan, 2.Julian, 3. Brother Jules, 4. Oliver, 5. Peter

We managed to jag the outside couch and took up most of the area. My hot chocolate and croissant arrived, barely 30 seconds after sitting down. Lisa took to the couch and would probably have been happy to stay there all day. Conversation was very lively with a real sense of achievement amongst the group. However, come 10.30am we were off for the final fling as we dragged ourselves away and headed towards Lesmurdie and Welshpool Roads.

It was an average descent today with top speeds in the mid 70s. The sprint to Tonkin Highway was fairly low key with everyone keen to avoid the head wind. John’s bike had developed a chain/gearing problem but he managed to hold on until he turned off in East Vic Park. A few others took shortcuts home and the rest of us rode back to the car park via the bike path. It was nice not to get abused by any car drivers and also not to be laden with layers of clothing, except for Lisa, whose arm warmers became obsolete after the first couple of kms and ended up as handle bar fashion accessories.